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It`s ok if you don`t like my personality,,, I`ve got others.
Omg!! got 6 numbers on the Lotto.. and the stupid machine didnΒ΄t pick any of them
The sexiest fantasy in 50 Shades Of Grey is the bit where she gets a job in journalism without having to do years of unpaid work experience.
I will never be to old to laugh when somone farts in a public bathroom peeing..
Your eyes are so beautiful. If you look deep enough i can see my own reflection...
Sometimes the best helping hand you can give is a good, firm push
I hate when people post lyrics from songs, but I will survive.
Given the places I`ve had my tongue, no we cannot "just be friends".
If one goes to online college, do they have to haze them self?
I wish you could Google anything. Like, "Where the f*ck is my remote?" and it would be like, "It`s under the couch dumbass."
I`m an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.
I hope I never go to jail because I haven`t memorized a phone number since 2001
I canΒ΄t wait for summer. One of my highlights of summer is talking into the fan to hear my robot voice.
Experience is something you donβt get until just after you need it.
I bet kangaroos get drunk and find some ridiculous shit in their pouches in the morning.