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At least mosquitos are attracted to me.
I wish I could afford to be as weird as I wanna be.
Every day is a struggle between wanting to lose weight and wanting to eat my weight in pizza.
My new years resolution is to try to actually finish someth
Dear parents of college students on Spring Break, Congrats! Many of you are about to be grandparents!
the difference between people and celebreties ...... celebreties don`t have a routine
Sรถ รฎ hรจรฃrd รฟรดu lรฌkรช gรนรฟลก with รกcรงeรฑts?
Do handjobs from girls who speak sign language count as blowjobs
You are so selfish! Youยดre going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night!
I`ve seen more pins in the last few days then stone cold steve austin on groundhog day..
If you`re sick and tired of every Asshole on Facebook asking you to copy and paste stuff as your status, please copy and paste this as your status.
Well ... here I am ... cleverly disguised as a responsible adult!
Roses are cars, violets are buckets. This poem makes no sense. Eyeballs.
If the shoe fits, buy it.
Hope dogs are kissing us and not trying to see if we started tasting good yet.