Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Bought some cheese at one of those fancy cheese shops today. It was legend dairy...
My New Years Resolution is to be less vain. It`s going to be difficult though, considering how sexy I am.
The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn`t for any religious reasons. They couldn`t find three wise men and a virgin.
I have no interest in skydiving. I get enough of an adrenaline rush hoping my credit card goes through
I think most of my friends hang out with me to see what I’ll say next.
The best stories ever told always end with the words”…and then I got the hell out of there.”
I was going to do some spring cleaning, but the snow has ruined it for me.
I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.
YouTube "This video is not available in your country". where the hell am I from? NARNIA?
The trick to successfully backing out of a parking space is to not care what happens to you or anyone else.
Cats would be even more stuck up if they knew how much the internet loves them.
I`m hoping to avoid a situation where I have to dance to save my own life.
I saw a comedian one time who did nothing but make geography puns. talk abbottabad act.
From now on when I accept a friend request I`ll just write on their wall: You belong to me now.
If you come up to my bedroom door and find a sock on the knob it means I`m having sex ... Probably with the other sock.