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Quiet people have the loudest minds.
I built that beach a sandcastle. Beaches love sandcastles.
life is like a bed of roses just got to whatch out for the pricks
Whenever someone ends their status with "LOL" I know it`s a repost, cuz...who the hell laughs at their own statuses? LMAO!
They say you are what you eat but what happens if you didn`t mean to eat it. I don`t want to be a bug.
Why the hell do we still use snow shovels when flame throwers are available?
If it doesn’t make you afraid to go to the bathroom the next day, it’s not really hot sauce.
Just so you know, I am already planning on being an a$$hole tomorrow.
Health insurance is rare for exotic dancers. Most strippers have little or no coverage.
I recently jumped on the back of my psychologist and started counting...1...2...3 and he was so suprised asking me what I was doing and I answered offendedly: "Well you`re the one who said I could always count on you !"
The new Jungle Book movie might be confusing to today`s kids who don`t remember when we had jungles. Or books...
A good way to mess with a jogger is to run up along side them and say "I think we lost them."
If you put a "Student Driver" sign on top of your car, Nobody will ever suspect you of drunk driving.
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental issues
Thanks for posting pics of what you had for dinner, the suspense was f*cking killing me.