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Somehow I thought growing up would involve more than staring at my phone
I’m single by choice. Not my choice, but still a choice!
My resolution last year was to learn Spanish, and that only lasted about dos weekos.
The best neighbors are the ones you never see.
Facebook is basically just you having a conversation with yourself hoping that someone else will join in.
Laughter is the best medicine (that my insurance is willing to cover)
I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
exactly how long is a cotton picking minute.
Working from home and HR already cited me for sexual misconduct.
I plucked my first gray hair today ... Man, that lady was upset.
Sometimes I just go on Facebook to see who has been dumped and who is pregnant.
I have to be funny because being hot is not an option.
It’s people that give drinking a bad name.
I asked my girlfriend why she never tells me when she orgasms. She said she doesn`t like phoning me at work.
New Study: Long-term beer drinking can lead to depression, also known as "running out of beer."