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Don`t rush me. I`m waiting for the last minute.
I don`t always drink beer. But when I do, I always lie about not always drinking beer.
Dear axe body spray, Could you Please put a suggested spray size on your deodorant bottles. Best regards, Asphyxiated girls everywhere.
I have this talent of getting tired without doing nothing.
Is beer cheaper on cyber monday?
Its all sh!ts and giggles until someone giggles and sh!ts
"There`s a sleeping person. Let`s go ask it questions." ā Children
At this age, I drive everything like I stole it because sometimes I forget which car is mine.
Facebook should just change it`s name to "People You May Want to Avoid."
"I want to marry a smart, rich, and beautiful woman. But I don`t feel like getting married 3 times." - Hesam Ebrahim
Wow....turns out I`m NOT a Ninja. That really hurt.
I just saw a disclaimer that said "don`t try this at home", so I tried it at my neighbors house.
Iām still kind of pissed they never told us how to get to Sesame Street.
If you grew up wanting to be a Plumber or a Pizza delivery boy, You watched too much porn as a kid.
To help reduce cost, this status was typed in china.