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It’s called “Karma” and it’s pronounced [hah hah fuhk yoo]!!
No one’s going to do it for you. It’s up to just you to make naps a priority in your life.
Few things are creepier than someone saying "I know" after you introduce yourself.
I just don`t want to look back and think "I could`ve eaten that"
Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because they`re looking for ideas.
Why is it called a "personal trainer", instead of an "exercist"?
I`m sorry if I looked interested. You probably caught me fantasizing about bacon.
To whoever has my voodoo doll, scratch between my butt cheeks....I`m in public.
How long do I have to stand in front of the microwave for to become a member of X-Men?
Holy sh*t! Did you guys know Facebook has a "sign out" button?
You being crazy doesn`t bother me. It`s you being crazier than me...That makes me freakin` jealous.
I`m sorry officer, I thought you wanted to race.
Just got a Cheerio stuck between my toes walking through the kitchen. Clearly my dog isn’t doing his part of the chores around here.
So your baby doesn`t know any tricks at all?
Well another funny thing about this status is, by the time your done reading this, you realize it talks about absolutely nothing and you just wasted your time. Welcome to Facebook.