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Life is beautiful ...... but Monday`s suck all the way around.
Just seen the new Batman shampoo in Costco. I can`t believe they haven`t paired it up with a conditioner Gordon.
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. It’s called Lunch.
you know....I wasn`t planning on going for a run today....but those cops came out of nowhere
Do handjobs from girls who speak sign language count as blowjobs
In all my years, I have never finished a pencil.
Everything just seems much better when you`re in denial
Boobs are like the Sun. You can stare at them directly just for a few seconds, but if you put on sunglasses, you can stare as much as you want!
My body is by no means a temple but it can be one heck of a amusement park ride...
"Wish You Were Beer!" Wait...no...that`s right...send.
I wish bedtime was all the time.
can´t find Sesame Street on my GPS. Can you tell me how to get there?
When it comes to speaking Spanish I know the essentials. "Taco, nacho, burrito, cheeto, frito & no comprendo."
My problem is, I`m about 30% stud, and 70% muffin.
Today I´m going to entertain the kids with a game of duct, duct, tape.