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Here`s a thought: Let`s let the illegal Mexicans stay and send the whining crybabies to Mexico. At least the illegal Mexicans are willing to work.
I try to explain to my kids during the movie that in reality, even a cowardly lion would eat a girl and a little dog.
I like them big and fake. ~Me talking about Christmas trees
My girlfriend called me lazy the other day. I almost responded.
It`s only October 3rd and I`ve already beaten the sh!t out of two motion activated skeletons at store entrances.
Sometimes bigger is just heavier
Time to turn over a new leaf ... With my luck it’ll be poison ivy.
Currently under the influence of cold and flu medicine...my actions can not be held against me!
From 8am until 12pm, my job basically pays me to think about what I am going to have for lunch
I will pay good money to anyone who can take me from work, make it look like an abduction and tuck me back into bed.
October is breasts cancer month. I stare because I care.
If at first you don’t succeed, look in the trash for the instructions
Women.Some men undermine, disrespect and consider them weak,forgeting the countless spanks they got from their mothers
I hate when reality happens outside of my head.
Movie comes on while im in bed: ugh ive seen this a million times. Movie comes on before I have to get ready for work: oh hell yea a classic