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Make sure your goals are unattainable so you`ll feel a little better about giving up later
I’m drinking like there’s snow tomorrow.
Three weeks without a signal typo!
We have GPS that can navigate you across the country. Why can`t someone invent a device that can remind you why you went into a room?
If my body was a car, I`d trade it in for a newer model. Cause everytime I cough or sneeze, my radiator leeks and my exhaust backfires.
"The Twilight Zone" makes me long for the days when you could smoke on a spaceship.
Remember the good ole days when we had to get out of bed to use the Internet.
When I think of a SELFIE, I`m not sure it`s the same thing you`re thinking of...
The internet is just another location for people to be wrong about things.
Just so you know, I am already planning on being an a$$hole tomorrow.
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can´t remember the other two.
Moses had the first tablet with cloud connectivity.
It takes about 2.9 seconds for me to go from “this is the best day ever” to “I want to stab every person on planet Earth.”
awesome collection!
Swearing: because sometimes "golly gee" and "meany" just don`t cut it.