Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Ladys, if you`re in an argument with a guy and there`s no may to win. Start playing with your boobs...works every time.
Our parents always taught us NOT to write on walls... Facebook teaches us differently
Wanted: Magic hat for a snowman
Sometimes I pretend to be normal. But it gets boring ... so I go back to being me. ;)
You know nothing about a woman, until she is drunk and mad at you.
Homeless people should make more creative signs like "I bet you can`t hit me with a quarter...b!tch!"
Just took a "Try Me" sticker off one of the plush toys at Wal-Mart and stuck it on a condom box.
I don`t throw anything out anymore I just go to TGI Friday`s once a month and glue more sh!t to the wall, no one notices, try it
If you ever get a flat tire, take a picture of it on your phone so for future reference you can use it as a valid excuse.
There is no angry way to say `bubbles.`
If heat makes things expand, then I don`t have a weight problem ... I am just Hot!
I’ve found the best way to learn your co-workers’ names is by eating their food in the office fridge
I love the smell of a liquor store in the morning!
The only thought I have for the weather lately is that someone somewhere is losing a game of Jumanji.