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Redneck word of the day : Asphalt. It`s your own dumb asphalt !!
"I really should buckle down and get my rap album going"-Me, every time I drink
I saw a piece of chewing gum in the urinal today and thought, boy that must have been really painful.
Pumpkin for sale. Slightly used
I`ll bet other dogs must think that poodles belong to some weird religious cult.
Do NOT accept friend requests from Hormel Foods, it could be spam...
I am the bestest at the English language...
I don`t care what people think of me. It can`t be half as bad as what I think of them...
Of course everyone seems sexy in a nightclub. There`s liquor and you can`t hear them.
People should have to pass an IQ test to use the internet.
You have to wait 30 days to buy a gun but Amazon Prime only takes 2 days to ship live bees, no questions asked.
Stop Instagramming words. I`m not following you for your thoughts. Take off your f*cking shirt.
is without a doubt, the most popular and best looking person using this laptop.
I accidentally did yoga once when I couldn`t reach the toilet paper.
Do you smoke? Smokers: "Yes." Non-Smokers: "Never have, never will." Stoners: "Smoke what?"