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Roadside sobriety tests are getting ridiculous...Last night I had to fold a fitted sheet.
Finally 21 and now legally able to do things which i have been doing since 15….
Hi, you`ve reached my voicemail. Send me a text like a normal person.
People who drive under the speed limit are probably the same people who drink decaf.
I bought a used UPS truck. It gets bad gas mileage but I can park anywhere.
No Girlfriend November was a success, now for Don`t Date December, Just Me January, Forever Alone February, No Match March..... I got this.
the real full form of M.B.A....Married But Available
If you attached a bunch of watches together to make a belt it would be a waist of time.
IRS: We`ve got what it takes to take what you`ve got.
No, an erection is not considered personal growth.
Someone just called me normal, I`ve never been so insulted in all my life!
Why do they leave folding chairs so close to the wrestling ring? Shouldn’t the maintenance staff have learned their lesson by now?
Just once I`d like a doctor to tell me I`m not getting enough beer in my diet.
This getting older thing really sucks. These days my eyes are so bad I have to buy the Large Print edition of Alphabet Soup.
The point is... Is Imma hug you like a panda nd you`re gunna like it.!(: