Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
It`s a little disappointing when you`re watching a school basket ball game & no one turns into a werewolf.
Money can`t buy happiness, but I`d rather cry in a Ferrari.
After visiting the gov`t healthcare site, I don`t know why I was so worried about their ability to spy on me...
To the 84yo woman that won the $591 million dollar PowerBall, sup baby ;)
The wrong time to have a seizure is probably during a Harlem Shake Video.
One advantage of growing old is you don`t have to worry about hackers stealing your nude pics out of the cloud.
Whenever you`re feeling really bad about yourself just remember, there`s people that pay money to exercise.
What if cell phones are part of an elaborate plot to rid the world of phone booths so Superman has nowhere to change?
Being a camera must be pretty cool. You get to sleep until there`s something cool to see.
My wife asked about my wildest sex fantasy, but she got pissed when I told her. I probably shouldn’t have started w/ “After your funeral...”
The worst part about being single is always doing what I want. Anytime. Anywhere. With whomever. That sucks.
Why do they leave folding chairs so close to the wrestling ring? Shouldn’t the maintenance staff have learned their lesson by now?
Relationships are mostly you apologizing for saying something hilarious
I won employee of the month!!!…. again! I love being self employed.
I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap a better status than yours!