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You`re uglier than..... well, you`re the example.
People reckon I´m too patronizing (that means I treat them as if they´re stupid).
That awkward moment when you make a Harry Potter reference and none of your Muggle friends get it.
I may not be the smartest guy in the world, or the richest guy in the world, or the best-looking guy in the world, but,....Oh,hell. Now I`m depressed.
When I go running, I usually meet new people..... like paramedics.
You’re the shampoo in the eyes of my life.
I hate how my friends are always trying to convince me to do extreme activities. Like bungee jumping, skydiving or leaving the house.
Nothing screws up your Friday more than realizing it’s only Tuesday.
You`re the one who wore a red and yellow scarf to class. So don`t look at me weird for shouting "10 points for gryffindor" when you answer questions cause I know you wanted this. -Bfanch
You had me at "do we need to stop at the liquor store on the way to your place"
I wonder how many couples would still be together if they traded phones for a weekend
I hope I’m the last guy on earth — I wanna see if all those women were lying to me.
Being single is the worst sh!t ever. Being in a relationship is a close second.
Why has no one invented a button next to snooze which emails your boss to say you`re gonna be late?
Get Dora and Boots on this missing plane case now, Dora solves the case everytime