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Fish must be excellent drivers. Very rarely do you hear about fish getting into car accidents.
The Bible is pretty accurate...Especially when thrown at close range.
Finally 21 and now legally able to do things which i have been doing since 15….
I just don`t want to look back and think "I could`ve eaten that"
Ladies, if you are really good at blow jobs, you don’t have to pretend to like football.
"Oh wow, it`s a fruit cake! I`m going to eat some of it right now" ...said no one ever.
I don`t get why people find drunk texts annoying. You`re the person they`re thinking of when their brain can`t even function properly.
“Oh boy, I can’t wait to be productive today.” – said no one ever
I love secretly placing a deck of cards on top of someones ceiling fan.
There’d be less accidents if there was a texting lane.
I need my coffee before I start pretending to work.
Water is the most essential element of life, because without water, you can’t make coffee.
I hate it when people dont know the differece between Ur and U`r
Im thinking, The best part about sitting down at the computer for a minute and making a status message like this is that by the time you`ve finished reading it and taking a minute out of your day you`ll have a brand sense of enlightenment and awareness that you never had before once you realize that there is absolutely no point to this post whatsoever.
To all my friends who sent me best wishes for 2013, for 2014 could you please send money, alcohol or petrol vouchers…Cheers!