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I like the part of the day when food happens.
Vodka is the answer...but I can`t remember the question.
Don`t rush me. I`m waiting for the last minute.
I wanna say something. I´m gonna put it out there. If u like it, u can take it, if you don´t, send it back. "I want to be on you"
Ya .... That Supermoon was OK ..... But I was quite disappointed when I realized it didn`t even have a cape.
Wow, I haven`t seen you since the last time I wish I hadn`t seen you
Helping my kid study for her geology exam, and apparently `hard` `classic` and `punk` are not the 3 different types of rock.
I wish my wallet came with free refills.
Digging through a box in the closet and I found a picture of me sitting on Santa`s lap. Hard to believe that was almost 2 years ago.
A good way to mess with a jogger is to run up alongside him and say, "It`s okay, I think we lost him."
Pretending I`m a pleasent person all day is exhausting
And today I learned to never ask a woman how she dye`s her roots black.
Hey Pringles, it`s time to widen the can. Your core demographic isn`t exactly thin-wristed.
What`s this g-mail? I just got used to e-mail. And why did they skip f-mail?
I like staying up insanely late but I also like getting 12 hours of sleep. See my dilemma?