Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
On my tombstone I want it to say: ‘I didn’t forward the text message to 15 friends.” ;)
Hey, Dude who flips me off for honking at him in the parking lot, your groceries are on top of your car.
If I were my boss, I`d never leave my coffee cup unattended.
Just because they sell yoga pants in XXL doesn`t mean it`s ok to wear them in public.
I`ll never become mature enough to not laugh out loud when the person in the stall next to me farts so loud it sounds like a volcano just erupted.
I should probably be in a relationship just for the supervision.
Scream “Chrome is better than Firefox” around a group of geeks if you wanna see them argue for 2 hours.
I wish the guy who made the vacuum cord would chat with the guys that make phone chargers.
One day we the women will rap the men lets see how they like it!
I can`t wait to get all liquored up, and then go door-to-door to sing some Christmas Carols when it starts to warm up in April...
I have tons of friends! Well i only have one... but she ways a ton!
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called " fun size" should really re-evaluate their stanards of entertainment.
You don’t truly know someone until you see how they react to their bag of chips getting stuck in a vending machine.
I believe that every person has a story to tell...which is why I stay at home.
If you needed to wear camouflage in a gingerbread house, would you wear ginger snaps?