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Lets face it we have all tried to get something done before the microwave timer goes off.
Let`s run away together.. Lol jk, I don`t run anywhere.
The awkward moment when you’re that one friend who always gives relationship advice but is still single.
good boys go to heaven bad boys go every where
I prefer not to think before I speak. I like being just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.
Despite the high cost of living, it still remains popular.
Sometimes I get shivers in my spine just thinking about how much tougher Popeye would`ve been if he`d eaten fresh spinach instead of canned.
I bet wrecking ball operators are some of the happiest people in the world.
If tit for tat doesn`t mean flashing guys with tattoos, than I`ve been doing it wrong this whole time.
I haven`t talked to my wife in three weeks. I didn`t want to interrupt her.
I know some of you would find it hard to believe, but I don`t say everything that pops into my head. I don`t think the average person could handle it.
There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing.
I want to lose weight, but I don`t want to get caught up in one of those "Eat right and exercise" scams.
I had my Crayola guy re-run the numbers,,, and there`s only 36 shades of grey
It`s kind of creepy that you noticed me staring at you.