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If Miley doesn`t get her sh!t together, all these Hannah Montana collectibles are never gonna get my kids through college.
Definition: Brain - Your body`s hardest working organ. It works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, from birth until you...fall in love.
Saw a guy with flames tattooed all over his face. I hope someday he finds a girl who has marshmallows tattooed all over hers.
I`m pretty sure whoever coined the phrase " rise and shine", doesn`t do it anymore.
I swear this is the last time I watch Groundhog Day
After visiting the gov`t healthcare site, I don`t know why I was so worried about their ability to spy on me...
A walk of shame is always sad. Don`t make it worse by adding the sound of Flip flops to it.
The only thing worse than having a song stuck in your head for an entire day is not knowing the name of the song.
What doesn`t kill you makes you have lots of hospital bills.
( )( ) =( `-` )= <( . )> ("`)("`) bunny!!
Really don`t see the need for pants for the rest of this day. :)
Just realized all books are different combinations of the same 26 letters. This is BS!
I`m at my most badass when I`m popping a wheelie with a shopping cart.
Sure thing.... follow me... I`ll show you the fastest way to get to nowhere.
Sometimes I send status updates from my phone so it looks like I left the house.