Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Ahhh another Monday at work...... I`m having as much fun as a colorblind person playing Twister!
You`re not a geek or a nerd because you always have to have the latest high tech gadgets and electronics. YOU`RE RICH
If there`s one thing that I`ve learned it`s, that I should have learned way more than one thing.
When I was growing up the TV was my nanny.
Sometimes you`ve got to ask yourself: `Why am I talking to myself?`
I could be a morning person if morning happened after 11.
For every action, there’s an equal and opposite reaction. Plus a social media overreaction.
When you can no long help someone, I can - said the coroner.
I wish I had my own private chauffeur. . . . Then I could really commit to being an alcoholic!
The hardest part about having a vivid imagination is finding enough things to climb on to avoid all the frickin’ lava on the floor!
i have noticed you notice me noticing you
Trying to untwist a twizzler is a real b*tch and this gas station cashier yelling at me isn`t helping.
If life gives you melons, you may be dyslexic.
5 symptoms of laziness –> 1.
Ain`t no sandwich when she`s gone.