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If you take Viagra with iron supplements it will cause you spin around and point North.
I`ll bet the guy who invented the snooze button never invented anything else.
People assume when I yawn that I’ve lost interest in what they have to say but truth be told, I was never interested.
Sorry, I`m in a hurry, lets talk while we walk... You go that way.
This town is about as exciting as watching an M&M melt in the sun.
exactly how long is a cotton picking minute.
"Polar bears can`t jump." - Black bears
When a girl says "no," a guy hears it as "try again tomorrow."
Man, the first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
Every time I`m around my mother in law, I wonder who is running hell in her absence.
My wife asked me what new hairstyle she should get, so I held my breath until I passed out.
They`re having a Jamaican hair-do day tomorrow at work. I`m dreading it.
They say 15 minutes of exercise every day will add 3 years to your life. The problem is that it adds the 3 years to your 80s not your 30s.
Does the employee manual say I CAN`T set up my camping tent inside my cubicle? No? Then please step outside & zip the door up behind you.
I wouldn`t do much for a Klondike Bar; I would however get naked for beer.