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My method of going "offline" in FB chat is to simply ignore you.
You learn something new everyday and if you didnt know that then you just did.
Wtf? I was always told to treat people the way I want to be treated.. Stupid sexual harassment charges pending.
I love nostalgia. Not sure what it means, but it reminds me of magical words from my childhood.
My face hurts from pretending to like you.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Social experiments where skinny people wear fat suits teach us to be nicer to fat people because it might be a skinny person in a fat suit.
My favorite thing about winter...waking up from hibernation!
Never hire a color blind Bomb Technician.
30 seconds left on the microwave ~ Women: set table, pour drinks, tweet, talk on the phone ~ Men: do the space shuttle countdown
I just spent a lot of time trying to form a thought when it would`ve been easier to just say, "F*ck it."
Not sure if people stopped saying YOLO or if everyone who said it died.
All of my plans for the future start out with “when I get rich”
All units be on the lookout, suspect is armed with hunky shoulders, soft eyes and dreamboat hair. I don`t even remember what he did anymore.
To my neighbor using a chainsaw at 7:30 on a Sunday morning: Try holding the other end.