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96% of my life is spent trying to figure out when I can get my next nap in.
Whenever I pick my Grandma up from the airport, I leave my left blinker on during the entire drive so she feels more comfortable.
Next time you over hear a stranger giving out their number. Text them details of what they are wearing. It`s so fun to watch them freak out!
"Nineteen letters long" is 19 letters long.
Checked a lot off my thought-about-doing-today list.
Sometimes I wanna copy someone´s status word for word and see if they notice.
Don`t believe everything you think.
If Trump wins I`m leaving the country. If Hillary wins I`m leaving the country. This is not a political post, I just want to go on vacation.
I chose the wrong fork in the road, took the road less travelled and got off the beaten path and now I don`t know where the hell I am.
When the nurse calls my name at the doctor’s office, I like to run through the waiting room like I got called on The Price is Right.
If a man says you`re ugly, he`s being mean. If a woman says you`re ugly, she`s jealous. If a little kid says you`re ugly, then you`re ugly.
Dear Car driving 40mph on the highway this morning. It`s only a 1/4“ of snow plus you have a "Jesus Fish" on your bumper. You`ll be just fine.
I guess I`m somewhat of a big deal, when I tell people about my accomplishments, they always say, "Big deal."
The reason I don`t play Scrabble online, is that I can`t throw the tiles at the person who beats me.
I eat my gummy bears 2 at a time ..no one should die alone