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Your call is very important to us. Please enjoy this 40 minute flute solo.
I wish you could order Karma like flowers and have it delivered.
Silence is Golden, except when coming from childrenβ¦ Then youβd better go check to see whatβs broken.
If Monday had a face... I`d punch it.
I know that no means no, but that`s about the extent of my Spanish.
Me- We need eggs. Hub- How many? Me- One. See if they will sell you just one.
often rambles on and on about this and that seeming to be heading towards a point but really just blabbing about nothing.
There are three kinds of people: Those who totally agree with my messages, those who kind of agree with me, and those locked in the trunk of my car.
Saying that your company has been in business since the 1800`s isn`t a selling point. Slavery existed then too...
If I didn`t drink, how would everyone know how much I love them at 2am?
I think I will stick to my old fashioned pepper shaker. This new pepper spray tastes terrible on my potatoes...
Why is it when I flush the toilet in the middle of the night, I have a feeling I woke up the entire neighbourhood?
This debate episode has to be the craziest Celebrity Apprentice I`ve ever seen!
To whoever said βfight fire with fireβ: do you actually test your own advice before giving it?
If offering people gum is cooking, then yes, I cook.