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The worlds gonna end in 5 days & I don`t know what I`m gonna wear.
Here`s a thought: Let`s let the illegal Mexicans stay and send the whining crybabies to Mexico. At least the illegal Mexicans are willing to work.
Sorry, kids. It appears ninjas ate all of our Halloween candy.
Plan B includes margaritas.
Mario Bros. Plumbing ????? (69 Reviews) Hired them to clear my drain, stomped my turtle to death and ran off with my girlfriend.
I have Beer.
life is too short to think twice and act wise....
I think I`m approaching my "best if used by" date
Wouldn’t exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them?
One of my female friend is reading a book called "Learn to drive in a week" for the last 3 years.
Pay no attention to the device around my ankle.
"I can`t believe it`s not clutter." ~ A recovering hoarder
There is 1 mosquito in my apartment. I have 50 bullets. Let`s dance.
My wife asked me to load the dishwasher. So I poured her some shots and told her to start drinking. And that`s how the fight started.
News flash! someone just found Carmon Sandiego!