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I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.
FINALLY home from work! So, yea...if your phone number is on your profile...I will be drunk dialing you in about 30 minutes or so.
Life is better when you can share it with a friend that has the same sick, twisted personality as yourself.
What if aliens only abduct crazy people, because nobody will ever believe them?
Do you ever watch a movie and realize you have to watch it again because you were on your phone the whole time?
I should be cleaning and disinfecting the toilet bowl today cause I have a feeling I`ll be hunched over hugging it later tonight.
I bought a used UPS truck. It gets bad gas mileage but I can park anywhere.
"The truth shall set you free"....unless you are in court. Then you should probably shut the f*ck up.
Momma didn`t raise no fool. I did this all on my own.
Juicing changed my life. I went from being overweight, to being overweight and owning a juicer.
I wish Facebook would notify me when people deleted me, that way I could like it
Of course bears sh!t in the woods, they do most of their stuff in the woods, very few bears own a house.
Cubs fans, you need to wait 107 more years. But don`t worry, 2124 will be here before you know it!
This day needs more yesterday.
Only 3 more days until millions of people join the gym for a week.