Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sorry that most of my hilarious jokes are borderline inappropriate. And by sorry, I mean you`re welcome.
I don`t always have awkward moments, but when I do I make sure I write them on Facebook so my friends know how awkward they were.
I`m not saying women are smarter than men, but it`s kinda ironic that there`s so few known women serial killers and so many unsolved murders.
You offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
R2-D2 from Star Wars, still holds the record for most curse words in a movie.
I don`t want to set the world on fire........just you.
I dont know about you guys, but I am amazed Pringles is able to constantly grow the same shaped potato. Science.
This is my first lame status of the year. Enjoy!
Their bedroom door is closed. I better walk in there for no reason. - kids
I bet my road rage will be taken seriously once I get a car.
Tried to make a stew and accidentally summoned a demon again.
No one your age has any idea what they`re doing either. No matter what age you are.
"I`ll drink to that." -me to my next drink
Cleaning a house while toddlers are in it is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos.
Anyone who calls it a "day off with the kids"... Either has no kids or doesn`t know what "day off" means.