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Got caught up in a really good book last night. I didn`t stop coloring till 2 o`clock this morning.
All I see on Facebook is penis, orgasm, bang him, bang her, bullwhip, masturbate, porn, tits, and then I read everyone else`s posts..
Gravity is a real downer.
I don`t like making plans for the day, because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown around in the courtroom.
If you`ve never needed to move to a new city and assume a new identity, then we probably haven`t dated.
I hate it when my fat makes me look fat.
One thing I`ll never understand is alcohol free wine
Farting isn`t ladylike? Well, neither is giving a blowjob, but I have never heard you complaining about that!
Do people who exercise not know about ice cream and Netflix?
Don`t worry if you had a bad day, remember there are people who have their ex`s name tattooed.
Remember bad decisions make the best stories!!!
I am upping my standards.. so up yours!
I`d like to share my innermost thoughts and feelings with all of you, but I`m afraid they`ll be used against me in court someday.
I was asked what I would give the woman who has everything? Well…my phone number for a start.
I`m Outdoorsy, as in I like to get drunk and pass out in the yard....