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Today I broke my personal record for most consecutive days lived.
What this country needs is more unemployed politicians...
Wishing you a fabulous 2014 that is full of great achievements and experiences. A meaningful chapter waiting to be written HAPPY NEW YEAR!
If you’re not fully satisfied with your life, do something about it. Or complain about it on the internet. Whatever you prefer.
Just bought a Ken doll. I don`t know what everyone`s talking about, you can`t read books on this thing.
The best time to reexamine your life is when you find yourself reluctantly nodding to the questions asked at the start of an infomercial.
Flash mobs are so not what I thought. Now I`ve gotta go find my clothes.
Who has time to monitor followers/unfollowers? I can barely keep track of my kids and I only have 1 of those ... Wait ... Two. I have 2 kids.
“Too much milk left need more cereal” always leads to “too much cereal need more milk”
I don`t understand interventions. What`s the point of being told I drink too much by a room full of reasons why I drink in the first place?
had a great time horseback riding today but then I ran out of quarters
Can anyone tell me how to become a illegal immigrant, their benefits are undeniably more superior to our own.
Never hire an Electrician with no eyebrows
Confucius would have been great at Status Updates......
I just ran a .003048K