Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
There are no bad pictures. That`s just how your face looks sometimes.
Today I discovered that two wrongs definitely don`t make a right. Tomorrow I`m going to try three.
Now that football season is here, if anyone`s favorite team loses, they can just blame it on Trump.
Just pour the coffee and back away slowly.
Me- We need eggs. Hub- How many? Me- One. See if they will sell you just one.
Is it just me, or does this gravy I made taste like scotch? Anyway, best Thanksgiving EVER!
Changing a whole text message just because you didn`t know how to spell one word?
I will be back in 5 minutes, if I am not then please read this again! :D
When I text someone and they dont text me back, I automatically assume that they fainted from overexcitement.
TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public.
Looking forward to `Breaking Bad` merchandise. Especially the cook book.
Whenever a wrong number calls me and hangs up I always call em back and tell them it was their loss because I`m really fun to talk to.
I would tell you to go to he!! but all dogs go to heaven.
I`m surprised people still ask me if I want to hold their baby given the number of times I`ve dropped my phone.
Just bought a car with the money from my swear jar.