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My favorite outdoor activity is going back inside.
I wonder what "don`t touch" is in Braille.
Love your neighbor ... but don`t get caught.
I really shouldn`t have driven home from the bar last night. ..Especially since I walked there. :)
If you drink enough, your brain starts photo-shopping people.
I could really go for a beer and a million dollars.
The covers of this book are too far apart.
If I hit snooze 3 times it should automatically send an email to my boss saying I`ll be out sick.
Just saw a Christmas tree drive by with a Smart Car strapped to the bottom of it.
Start each day with a positive thought like, "I can go back to bed in about 17 short hours."
I don`t normally poop with the door open, but I don`t want to miss the in flight movie
OMG, you`re huge! There`s no way you`ll fit inside me.- My clothes probably.
Relationship status: sleeping in my bed diagonally.
Is it bad when I´m talking to myself and I´m not even listening?
The mailman just delivered an 8-track of Boz Skaggs Greatest Hits. I guess this fulfills my Columbia House obligation.