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"It seemed like a good idea at the time"............................... An often used phrase in a lot of my memories.
I do not have commitment issues... I`ve been buying the same brand of vodka for 8 years!
"You`re right I`m sorry. You`re right I`m sorry. You`re right I`m sorry. You`re right I`m sorry" - me practicing for a successful relationship.
How can we call ourselves "evolved" when signs are needed to remind people to wash their hands after they go to the bathroom
It`s actually pretty impressive how many poor decisions I can fit in a day.
A word of advice, stay on my good side. My good side is in Hawaii.
Yes it may sound childish but if it glows in the dark I still get freaking exited.
Here walk a mile in my shoes. They`re giving me huge blisters.
One day we the women will rap the men lets see how they like it!
Not to brag but my bank says I have an outstanding balance.
Just saw 2 homeless guys hitting eachother with cardboard... PILLOW FIGHT!
I don`t really like the idea that James Franco might be in my grandkids` history textbooks.
I was the kid my parents warned me about.
If I’m ever murdered, I have no doubt that my chalk outline would include my phone in my hand.
I just slid off the couch and lay on the floor for a while and eventually sat up without using my hands, is that a yoga class?