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Here`s a thought: Let`s let the illegal Mexicans stay and send the whining crybabies to Mexico. At least the illegal Mexicans are willing to work.
Is it wrong to tell a knock knock joke to a homeless person ?
Good news: I can still do a full split! Bad news: It wasn`t on purpose!
Today is "National Take Your Flask To Work Day." ... I just made it up. Tell the others.
The skeletons in your closet are suggesting that you upgrade to a double wide, walk-in.
Burned almost a thousand calories with the elliptical machine today. Moved it into the basement, that thing is heavy!
Trying to understand women is like trying to smell the color 8.
I finally stopped caring what other people think ... I hope everyone`s ok with that.
No magician can do a trick that impresses me as much as that ‘take off my bra and make it appear out of my sleeve’ thing that girls do.
I remember 2012 like it was yesterday.
I think my problem is that I have really fantastic bad ideas…
Another successful year no random father`s day cards in the mail!
Crayons are a lot like M & M`s, all the colors taste the same.
There is no time to check time
Im convinced that one day we will all live in the future.