Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Easy baked macaroni and cheese recipe: Boil macaroni in water.... follow the rest of the instructions on box. TADA!
I`d rather run into the four horsemen of the apocalypse than a group of women out on a "girls` night."
I can’t hang out tonight because I’m done with people for the day.
I just scrolled so far back on Facebook`s Timeline... I wound up back over on MySpace. :(
If my father taught me one thing, it was probably how to take both hands off the wheel to sarcastically applaud people in traffic.
I don`t have ADHD. I have ADOLS. Attention deficit..OH LOOK! Skittles!
Your so lazy you should have a Life Alert bracelet that says I`m Just Napping.
Roses are Red Violets are Blue, If I had a brick, I`d throw it at you.
Sometimes you have to burn a few bridges to keep the crazies from following you.
The sound of children laughing makes me happy. Unless I`m home alone and my power goes out.
Sitting out in my front yard pointing a hair dryer at speeding cars to see if any slow down.
I am having one of those days where my middle finger answers every question.
I think my TV remote has developed some sort of Romulan cloaking technology.
Rabbits jump & they live for 8 yrs. Dogs run & they live for 15 yrs. Turtles don’t do anything & they live for 150 years. LESSON LEARNED!
Im switching some friends from my Facebook account to my Fakebook account.