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Hey dude who flipped me off in the Subway parking lot for honking at you, you left your dinner on top of your car.
We live in a society that`s the most knowledgeable about a zombie apocalypse, but the most likely to be eaten while staring at our phones.
Where do I see myself in 5 years? May 2019. Next question.
For the first time in my years of working I have been hard at work all day......dammm those pills!!!!
Judge me if you will, just keep the verdict to yourself.
Panick, chaos, anarchy... my work here is done.
My doctor told me, "DON`T mix this medicine with alcohol or you could wake up somewhere naked with a monkey on your arm." CHALLENGE ACCEPTED
"Please don`t do this." - my voice mail greeting
everyone is BEAUTIFUL in there own way--your just to UGLY to see that
That Awkward Moment when you’re being sarcastic and someone believes you.
I am upping my standards.. so up yours!
i have noticed you notice me noticing you
that awkward moment when you`re alone somewhere and trying to take a picture of yourself.
You know you can`t say "happiness" without saying "p*nis"
I’m watching this show on stalkers, still haven’t seen any of you yet.