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My driver`s side window stopped working,,,, So yeah,, I`m probably gonna starve to death..
I`m sure the fellow below don`t have big feet :(
The block button is just the adult version of sticking your fingers in your ears and repeating "I can`t hear you" over and over
Dear college students, Sorry about your GPA. - Netflix
There`s no life problem that a good "F*ck this shit" can`t solve.
I thought I was on the cash cab show! But turns out I was in a police car and cops hate trivia.
I told everyone at work that I have a twin so that when I see them in public I won`t have to talk to them.
I’m considering becoming a mind reader ... What are your thoughts?
If your phone doesn´t ring it´s me.
I’m going to the gym because I heard they have free weights. I wonder how many they’ll let me take?
"That wasn`t chicken in the Chow Mein" I`d make a great Fortune Cookie writer.
LOL` the biggest lie on the internet.
Give a man a beer and he wastes an hour, teach him how to brew, and he wastes a lifetime.
My wife must have some big surprise vacation planned. She left a note by the bed telling me I had until tomorrow to have my bags packed.
My dog is eating. I`m sitting next to her, staring intently at her, making her obviously uncomfortable. Yeah, how`s THAT feel, mutt?